nghtmaredragon's dreams

a girl's life. scary, isn't it?


The night air is cool
I can hear the breeze ruffle the leaves of a near by tree

You run your fingers through my hair
A chill runs down my spine

A thousand lightening bugs surround us
Crickets are the night's music

I look deep into your eyes
And kiss you

The butterflies in my stomach travel up through my throat
I feel you hands on my body

My heart and mind race
Every inch of me tingles

As we fall deep into each other i can feel deep into your soul
Your skin so soft

Another deep kiss
And i lose my mind

Heat rushes over my body
Like boiling water it fills my brain

I feel your heart racing
And taste the salt of your skin

Your fingertips and feet are cold
Your lips soft

Our lips are all over each other
The taste of sweat fills my mouth

I close my eyes and lose myself
And with a surge of energy it's over


As i sit in my imagination
The darkness surrounds me

I hear nothing
The silence is deafening

I'm all alone
Not a friend in the world

Dark clouds surround me
The rain begins to fall

I feel like I've lost my best friend
Then realize i have

My heart's ripped out and lying on the floor
Tears stream down my face

It gets cold
My teeth chatter

I'm soaked to the bone
Every inch of me is wet

Is it from the rain
Or from my tears

I fall to the floor
My head in my hands

I'm all alone
As i lay on the floor

The darkness turns to water
I take a deep breath before i sink below the surface

I open my eyes
The salt burns

I jerk awake quickly
It was only a dream

No water, no flood
But still i cry
My eyes are red
They burn

As i sit all alone in the darkness


I sit alone
At my computer

Two friends are lost

One stolen
One drifting

What shall i do?

Should i kill?
Should i cry?
Should i kill myself?
Should i kill the one who stole my friends away?

Is this the answer?
Someone help me!!

I'm going to bust
I'm going to crack wide open

The pressure is building

I think of ways to destroy the people that have hurt me:

The end

My life was empty
Until you

We shy away from each other
But know we love each other

A door is opened
We become friends

I find a great friendship
And hopefully a passionate love

I was wrong
My world turned upside-down

You tell me you have to leave
I say, "Who cares"

We spend our last days together
Laughing and loving

And in the end i know
I'll watch you go


As fear courses through my body
The nervousness rises up

My hands are cold
Yet they sweat

My mind races
Yet remains calm

My body shakes
The blood seems to travel through my veins at one hundred miles an hour

My eyes clear
Yet they see nothing

As I sit writing
I think about what is to come

Will there be pain
Will there be suffering

My heart pounds
As i move ahead on my journey

If only

I think about you all the time
Even though i know i can't have you

You're in my daydreams
You're in my nightmares

My heart skips a beat every time you walk in the room
Even though i know i can't have you

The power you have over me is unimaginable
If only you knew how much you mean to me

I can tell you anything
You are my release

I cry tears for you and you don't even know it

Your mysterious ways inspire me
If only i could get inside of your soul

You've brought me out of a dark place and don't even know it
If only i could tell you

If only i could have you
Touch you
Feel you

If only...


A wondering soul
A blackened heart

A clouded mind
A faceless girl

A soul that was free
Now locked in a prison

A heart that was full of love
Now full of hate

A mind that was creative
Now full of nothing

A face that was beautiful
Now ugly and scarred

A lifeless body floating through time
Never knowing what will happen next

In need of love
In need of caring

But will she remain a lost soul forever...?

My obsessed soul

We have a strange relationship
You and i

Are we friends?
Or are we lovers?

Your words make me think
My soul stirs with every waking thought of you

I need you here
But you're so far

You take away my pain
You take away my emptiness

My mind is always filled with you
If only you knew

You have pulled my blackened heart out of darkness
And turned it red again

My head is finally above water
No more drowning

The torment of us being apart is pleasure to me
With my obsessed soul

Piss off

Today you pissed me off
Every little thing you did crawled under my skin

I didn't get the good vibes from you today
I got hateful and mean vides instead

I felt like i was going to explode
If i didn't punch you

You make a smart-ass remark
I make one back, but it strikes a nerve

You slapped me across the face
I punch you in the stomach

There is no more love between us
No more friendship, no more trust

We slowly destroy each other

Hateful glances
And two broken lives


As i sit i listen

To the sounds on TV
To the sounds in the apartment next door

The laughing of two actors
The woman who slams the bathroom cabinet

The drier spinning downstairs
The little 6-year-old running on the porch

The birds
The dogs

Silence suddenly

No breath
No movement


Anger and rage course through my veins
Hatred fills the depths of my soul

Tears pour from my eyes
My jaw clenched shut

A pounding heart in my chest
Two tight fists at my side

My mind races, thoughts of terror and destruction
I loose myself

The pain is overbearing
No one understands

No one can help
Only i can fight through it

Everything that can go wrong does
People die, hearts get broken, lives are changed forever

My rage travels on
My center ripped out

Lies are told
Promises are broken
Friends are lost

Still, my rage travels on...


Do you know what it feels like to go crazy?
Do you know what it feels like to have someone drive you insane?

You always give, but you never get
Argue, fuss, and fight

I'm lonely
Very lonely

No friends
Only enemies

Dark world
Cold mind

Homesick, but don't wanna go home

Need an outlet for release
Is suicide my answer?

Cannot love anymore

Tears fall
Body hurts

Nothing has meaning anymore

Drugs and drinking maybe?

Violent sex and violent lives


No love, only infatuation

Keep it inside

Don't wanna tell you how i feel
I do love you, very much love

Need you here, need you help

But i'm all alone today

What we were

We're not what we were
Things have changed

You don't call
You don't write

You used to say, "i love you"
Now you don't

Things have gone terribly wrong
I don't feel the same way

You have changed
I have changed

For i love another
He can give me everything you can't

He can give me love and shelter
He can take away the pain you cause

And you will never know


I reach out, longing for anyone, a hand, a body
I'm all alone in a dark, black world

I need your touch, your kiss, you

I sit in the darkness
A slave to the spirits, day and night

They scare me
It's cold

Your arms were warm
Your heart soft

I miss you

At night i dream of you,
But the spirits make them nightmares

During the day i cry for you

It rains cold, hard drops that sting my face
I can hear the thunder rumble across the cold, gray sky
The lightning flashes, bright and yellow, like fire in my sinful soul

I think of you

I see your beautiful face
Your deep brown eyes make light in my world
You reach for me but are never really there

I scream

Another cold day

I cry more
My soul ripped to pieces
My soul like stone

I need your love,
But realize I'll never have it

I scream your name

You get what you give

I'm so sick of your bullshit
You fuckin' bullshit

You string me along
You think you can play me
Your wrong

I see through you
I'm not an ordinary girlfriend

But you don't know
I'm playing you back

You'll get what you deserve
And it will be sooner that you think

Revenge is so sweet
And i love another


Can I do it?
Can I make it?

Dealing gets harder and harder every day

When you're here your not
When you're here your sad

I can't make you happy
She can make you happy

Your feelings have changed
Your touch has changed

I can't lose you
I will not lose you

I will find out
I will find away

I will end her
And then I will end you

Tell me

Tell me
What have I done?

Have I hurt you?
Have I said something?

Tell me
So I can make it right

You act different
Not sure why

We talk
We laugh
But your not there

What can I do?
Tell me

Eternal Lover

I stand by you
Through thick and thin

You keep my head above water
You keep me breathing

Your words touch my soul
Your hands, my heart

You wipe my tears
And keep them for a rainy day

You make me smile
Even when my demons come

You defend me
When my enemies close in

I'll stay with you
Forever and ever
Even after the grave


Let me in
I want to know

What it is
That torments you so

I feel your knives
I feel you demons

I see what you see
I feel what you feel

You shy away
You hide your tears

Tell me how to help you
I want to make the pain go away

You cry out in silence
But I hear you,

I always hear you


We are forever joined
In a bond so true

It has been tried
It has been tested

We have been pulled apart
We have loved others

But somehow,
We have found our way back to each other's arms


the adventures of a failed writer - 2003
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